When Trust is Broken
Sandy C. Freese
June 23, 2021
Betrayal comes in many forms. It could be an unfaithful spouse, a business associate throwing you under the bus to ensure a greater chance of getting a promotion, or a friend who shares your innermost thoughts with others. Have you ever gone to a trusted source for support only to walk away feeling that what you’re dealing with isn’t worth their time? Whatever the form, betrayal is painful.
I was contacted a few days ago by a woman who said she wanted to forward some of her clients to me. She was overloaded and needed support. As a CBT coach who wants to help individuals overcome past traumas, I was delighted. I agreed to speak with her, and we set up a time to chat. Unfortunately, she wasn’t the one who called, an associate of hers contacted me. After listening to his spiel, he offered to set up a zoom meeting with me. This meeting would be the first step of ensuring the growth of my clientele base. After he refused to share the expense of what he was proposing, I kindly said no thank you. This morning, he called again. After letting him know that I felt misled, he responded, “If you’re happy with the way things are and don’t want more clients, I guess that’s it.” This isn’t the first time I have been betrayed by others relating to my business.
This type of betrayal is prevalent in the world of business. But not knowing the person who is dishonest on a personal level, makes it easier to deal with. Cut ties and move on. The betrayal that comes from a loved one or a family member is much harder to deal with. I am alienated from much of my family after speaking out about the past abuse I suffered as a child. While the abuse was going on, I went to a trusted family friend who told me to keep my mouth shut. Tripple whammy! I was betrayed by my adult abuser, and then again by the woman I thought would help, and by some of my family. These betrayals had me reeling for years. I questioned my very existence, why was I put on this earth? I had no drive, no dreams, and no hope.
After going to weekly sessions with a psychiatrist or therapist for many years, I stopped going. Many benefit from attending sessions such as the ones I went to, but I needed a more active way to heal. I found myself researching and came upon CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), which offered various tools for emotional healing. I took steps, active steps, which benefitted me immensely. Upon reaping the rewards and moving to emotional healing, I went on to gain my accreditations in CBT and Professional Life Coaching. I also worked to become certified in NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming).
Is it possible that the rough things we go through lead us to the best things to come? I believe that is the case. Wake up every day, do something positive (just one step forward), and don’t let depression and past oppression take over your life. Realize your worth, disconnect from toxicity, and move forward! You do hold the key to your own success.
Something to think about…